Cure for boredom...

...I know there are many but this is the only one available to me now.

Don't you hate it when you know you have to finish something yet your body won't follow you? I am feeling exactly that right now. I have a report to finish but look at what I am doing... I am making a post to this blog. I could get fired for this, right? Hope not. Sometimes I ask myself why I even bother to write when obviously no one reads this site. I wish I have more friends. And since I don't have that many now, I'll just write here hoping that the internet will not tire of me yet.

I have been like this for about a week now. This could be a result of all the things that is bugging me. I need to find a decent yet cheap apartment, there are bills to pay, a lovelife to sort out... just to name a few. Life is just too sweet to me and never fails to give me something to work out. Hay! Well, that's life. You never know what you're gonna get next time.

I wonder if there are people who are actually worry-free. If there are please let me know. I admit that I am a worrier and that causes me more problem than what I already have. I want to stop being one. I just don't know how.

Well, it's time to go back to work. Enough of my ramblings.

Dream

I had this dream some time ago now, two weeks perhaps. The peculiar thing about this is that I don't normally remember dreams this vividly for this long. Some dreams are, as they are wont to be, fades from memory once my conscious mind took over. I wouldn't have mind this if the message is not so clear.

In my dream, an ex came back and made peace with me. It was nice and all... only that he asked me to marry him on Sept. 23, 2006. I was speechless and I could not believe I am hearing it right. I don't know but somehow in my dream I know that the day was sometime in June 2006. See... the marriage proposal was reasonable because normally here in my country, marriage preparations can be made in 2 months time. The dream ended there, with the camera focused on my face showing mixed emotions: indecision, surprise, fear and happiness.

I am not sure why I had that dream or why that intensity. It was likely, yes but something that I am not sure I want. What am I saying? Maybe I am just panicking subconsciously knowing that I am not getting any younger and I need to start a family soon if I ever want to have kids. But... why that date? Why him? Why can't I erase it from my mind? I'm telling you, it is nagging my brains everytime I have a free time. It is just there inside my head. Waiting for every opportunity to remind me of its presence.

What makes things more hazy is that... my lovelife is not in a very good shape now. I will discuss the details later when I am ready. But for now suffice it to say that everything seems falling apart.

I wish to get my life back on track.

Some positive thinking

I got this from an email. I am not a big fan of forwarded messages, especially those that scare you into passing the message on or you would have bad luck if not. Those are just annoying. I mean if you want to remember someone, why not just pass the email on but forego the threat part. But this one, I really like and I have to share it to you. This is nice, finding positive out of every negative, which we don't always manage to do. We could use this as a mantra whenever we got caught up in things that almost drive us into madness sometimes.

I am thankful...
1. For the husband who snores all night, because he is at home asleep with me and not with someone else.

2. For my teenage daughter who is complaining about doing dishes, because that means she is at home & not on the streets.

3. For the taxes that I pay because it means that I am employed.

4. For the mess to clean after a party because it means that I have been surrounded by friends.

5. For the clothes that fit a little too snug because it means I have enough to eat.

6. For my shadow that watches me work because it means I am out in the sunshine.

7. For a floor that needs mopping and windows that need cleaning because it means I have a home.

8. For all the complaining I hear about the government because it means that we have freedom of speech.

9. For the parking spot I find at the far end of the parking lot because it means I am capable of walking and that I have been blessed with transportation.

10. For the noise I have to bear from my neighbors because it means that I can hear.

11. For the pile of laundry and ironing because it means I have clothes to wear.

12. For weariness and aching muscles at the end of the day because it means I have been capable of working hard.

13. For the alarm that goes off in the early morning hours because it means that I am still alive.

AND FINALLY ....... for received e-mails because it means I have friends who are thinking of me, at least.

I hope that helps.

Like I don't know!

You scored as Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder. Congratulations! You are obsessive-compulsive! You know nothing curbs images of mutilating your mother like a good counting/checking/washing ritual... wait, DID you forget to turn off the stove???

Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder		75%
Eating Disorders		58%
Unipolar Depression		58%
Borderline Personality Disorder		42%
Antisocial Personality Disorder		33%
Schizophrenia		17%

Which mental disorder do you have?
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Bikers abound...

When driving around and there are lots of bikers darting here and there like asteroids in the sky, remember this...

"Matter occupy space, and they matter."

Enough said.